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Musings From Margo

... and while on the topic of abuse, I would be remiss not to mention the generational humanitarian abuse taking place between Palestine and Israel and the rise of antisemitic and Islamophobic hate here in America. I've tried for weeks to develop the appropriate words and keep landing on disgust and shame, and then I cry. I am shy, and I hate social media. I am a painter, not a writer or influencer. I'm a horrible communicator and literally must use an emotions wheel when having heavy conversations. I have an extensive and deep range of emotions, and they feel so BIG at times they are impossible to get out, so whatever I write will be about as valuable as Peggy Hills' musings. It also feels inauthentic and performative for me to repost the same tweets we've all already seen on TikTok and Twitter. But I understand the importance of speaking up when needed, especially with my privilege, so with the help of my emotions chart, here it goes.

-I feel sad humans are dying, and I want the killing to stop immediately.
-I feel rage to see what we make of our children if we don't kill them first
-I feel resentful that my tax dollars are funding this while I ration my insulin
-I am disgusted and ashamed to be human, knowing what we do best is destroy and then pretend we don't. We are parasites
-I feel hopeless that no matter how many times I vote, call Congress, sign petitions, or march, it seems useless
-I'm confused as to why calling for a ceasefire and the liberation of Palestine while acknowledging the horrors of Hamas and the conditions from Israel that created them in the first place is controversial. The innocent people of Palestine and Israel are the ones who pay the price for the actions of their governments, with little to no say in the process.
-Discussing the history of an issue to learn and do better in the future should be allowed.
-It is not antisemitic to question the abuse and overreach of the Israeli government.
-It is not Zionist to have empathy for the hostages and the families mourning their dead from 10/7.
-Being appalled at the genocide of the Palestinian people does not make someone a terrorist.  
-I feel fear that my Jewish and Muslim loved ones or their places of worship will be targets of unwarranted rage and hate    
-I feel angry, anxious, rushed, and useless knowing thousands of starving people bleed out while the powers that be stand by debating with no urgency if they deserve aid or the right to live.
-I'm worried that wars and weapons seem inevitable. If wars and the manufacturing of weapons were to stop, our economy would crumble. How sick is that? We kill to keep living; again, we are parasites.  
-I'm embarrassed all I can offer are complaints or my ignorant observations and have no answers or solutions

Whenever I post anything that's not a pretty picture of my paintings, I lose followers and business, deals go dead, and people go silent. So, since I've probably just ruined my career, let's go out with a bang, yeah.

Honestly, I feel ALL religions are cults or MLM schemes. This includes ALL formal religions and any spiritual oils, rub crystals on your depression podcast, reiki conferences, or sold on ETSY holistic B.S. (Yeah, I know I've probably offended a lot of people here.) I understand why they exist and are used to self-soothe and create perceived order in chaos. Being human is hard, and it hurts. And I know it's easier to have a pretend guardian or set of rules to guide you and give you hope, but I can't get on board. Most of the time, religions are used to control and abuse or as a cloak to hide misgivings and crimes. Look at how many people have died in the name of some god. It's unbelievable that we keep doing this century after century. If your god calls for hating or killing in any way, they are an abusive murderer.

I do not mean to disrespect you or your religion or your self-care routine, and I grew up as a Southern evangelical, so I know how much religion means to people. I also know the damage and division it can cause. If we are all designing our lives, minds, and morals around invisible sky people, but we can't recognize the humanity in the human being standing in front of our faces, we are lost. Again, I wholeheartedly respect your right to practice your religion without persecution or discrimination if that is your personal choice, but the second it crosses over into law, harm, or restrictions for others, it becomes abuse.

(P.S.  I will always be a workhorse that seeks tangible action. I wish I were, but I will never be a show pony. If you do not hear from me, it's because I'm working, thinking, pacing, learning, planning, and checking on my inner circle first, then working outward. I've always been this way. As always, IRL, my friends and loved ones will always know who I am and where I stand on an issue before someone I've never met from the internet can access my thoughts or feelings. If this bothers you, then go away.)

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Credit Noah Levin

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